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A beginning,

having the most wonderful time with Woman Unleashed Retreat summer 2016, its been truly fabulous!! You could say that’s the reason I’m here! having had such wonderful feedback and requests I thought it was about time I did this! And so I am begining, putting it out there for those who want more, please bare with me over the next couple of weeks while I find my feet and the utmost gratitude to those who have offered me so much encouragement.13626637_10154299454074004_8101592566668336925_n

Yummy artsnacks…. 

Today I combined the artsnacks challenge with mabsdrawlaween challenge, the artsnacks box was fabulous as usual :things are what you make of them pencil pin and mini zine by Adamson J. K., Maribu fineliner graphix pens set of four including a brush pen, Windsor and Newton drawing ink, a speedball standard nib holder and no512 pen nib, a connoisseur protégé short handle white nylon brush and a zig fudebiyori brush pen….. Happy days 

Day Twenty-nine 

Today’s Nudge, recap September.

Oh my goodness it’s been a blast with highs and not so highs, you know the natural cycle of things, there are times for energetic activities,  times for contemplating and times for rest and they are all important. They are certainly all important to me, I need all three or I struggle. September has been interesting in that respect as I have had to make choices in order to blog every day, energetically I have found this challenge incredibly challenging which has been a surprise. I have absolutely loved this experience though and have made a few new friends who I look forward to reading more about and getting to know more. In fact blogging every day with the group has really enhanced my sense of connection to some really rather lovely human beings.

So I’m still where I was when I started blogging in terms of my walking goal, actually if I’m honest I’m a step or five back from where I was, but I’m still out there nearly every day walking what I can manage, the goal of going to my local shop alone is still a way off, but I’m still working towards it and I refuse to sit down and do nothing so, you are going to have to deal with it universe, I will not stop trying! Painting has been sporadic and not as much but it’s been a bit and I’m looking forward to doing “drawoween” I tried taking part last year but flaked out as I do have to be a bit flaky sometimes, but this challenge has given me the confidence to commit, watch this space and see how it goes.

Life in general in September has been the same as everything else ups and downs, I saw a scan of my beautiful grandchild to be and I’ve just seen the latest and “Nancy-Rose” is perfect and has grown exactly as she should and her Mother is doing very well too, which makes her grandmother very happy! My other children are doing really well the two youngest that live with my partner and I are doing great, one of them is flying the nest and even though she’s twenty years old and we are ready for her to spread her wings it’s still a worry, the other home bird has managed to land herself a good job after going through a bit of tough time applying for a few months, it really took its toll on her confidence but now she is loving her new work environment. One of our sons who has been living some distance away has asked us to keep our eyes open for property in the area as he and his lovely partner are moving near home, the other son is doing fantastically and he and his partner I getting a van in order to travel as they have the bug, and his partner is arranging for the family to work as extras in a production she is working on, which I think will be great fun. Our eldest is doing the most gorgeous work, she’s a Potter and she does some amazing things and makes us so proud in how she is getting on with life after having an incredibly tough time. I just had to have a chuckle this post reminded me of chatting to my mother, we live in different countries so whenever I speak to her I give her a run down of all the children. She is over for a super quick visit next month and I can’t wait, she will have up crafting with her until I drop.

It’s been a month full of happiness and sadness as we found out my father in-laws to be’s cancer has progressed quite aggressively its a difficult situation when there is no hope at all……….. Our focus now is on the quality of his remaining time 

That’s me in the middle with my sister and one of my sons, I feel so truly grateful for my amazing family and my awesome children. 

Day Twenty-Seven

Today’s Nudge: Share a human moment you’ve had recently._20170927_203440

I’m a little bit further along with the lesson by Andrea Gomol for Life book 2017.

Hmmmmmm share human moment you’ve had recently …….blimey I have them all the time ….I can have days that I just trip from one faux pas to the next slowly dying inside as I catch the judgemental glimpses but being a human is hard and I’m just doing my best, sometimes its clumsy, messy and raw, but its always true and real, sometimes its all too much and I find a place of solitude and recharge ready for the next adventure.

In one month two of my old school friends have lost their lives to cancer, my father in-law to be has been given his prognosis for his cancer and its not good, my partner had the anniversary of his first wife’s death due to cancer leaving him and two gorgeous children to muddle through without her and its all just so terribly sad and impermanent, we are all always loosing people of significance in our lives, its part of this existence and impossible to avoid, for me personally its the losses I’ve experienced the heartaches and pain that have helped me realise how special this being human malarkey is and how very fragile it can be. And yet right now in my life there is just so much upset and bitterness between family members that have experienced so much sadness, you would think it would make them gratefully for every speck of love and happiness available to them rather than cause unnecessary conflict . I look at it and just see layer upon layer of pain being piled one after the other ….it hurts to watch …..it absolutely tears me apart to see people wasting precious opportunities to appreciate each other ……. so then the mirror is held up to me and I’m judging someone else just doing their best and that is my problem, I just want it all to be about the “love” of course there is more to it than that but essentially I like to think that we are all just doing our best and the answer to most things is love and then I realise what an idealistic human being I am …… I think I just want to retreat into hermitude and recharge but I am absolutely committed to this blog business and only three more days of my incessant babblings

Day Twenty-Six……

Today’s nudge: Compare what you used to want with what you presently want.

I used to want a life full of travel and excitement and discoveries, finding new places and people always on the go with hustle and bustle ……around-80days

I still like adventure in a way but it has become so much easier to find than I had imagined a good few years ago, I just need to be more observant and quieter to notice it there is so much joy and adventure all around and it changes with every season and for me every day, right now is an enormous adventure just walking a little and doing what I can do, it blows my mind and fills me with the excitement, of finding unchartered lands …. being deeply satisfied with what I have done today, pondering the day and just being so grateful for not being stuck in a chair or in bed it really is rather amazing and exciting …. and a slower more patient me has emerged, through necessity to keep my sanity I have focused on the wonder of more immediate environment and I am so grateful for that its not something I would have imagined possible without travel. That’s not to say I wont travel in the future hopefully, but it is to say I don’t need to, to satisfy  any great longing for adventure as it is all right here ….. the changing seasons are magical …… the noise of the leaves under foot is just glorious

 

Day Twenty-five 

Today’s Nudge, write about a way in which you have changed over the years……. I’ve changed a good deal really and I have to say I think that is as it should be, whats the thing about every action having a reaction… I think every action from the molecular to the sublime creates a reaction and vice-versa, it is the natural way of things to grow… Self compassion is something that has really taken a while to grow into, I really wish we could teach our youngsters that one amongst a few other traits that certainly for me have taken time and circumstance to learn.